One of the best posts about being called “politically correct” by assholes, ever.
“sphincter-print camouflage”
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Jan 192009
May 152008
The California Supreme Court overturned the statutory ban on same-sex marriage. (Large PDF of the opinion here.)
The forces of evil will be right back at it, though. Today we party elegantly–tomorrow back in the trenches.
Edit: Lynn points out that all three branches of government are in agreement on this. Take that, pseudo-originalist whinebots!
Oct 072007
I can teach my daughters about Photoshop, and patriarchy, and that people who tell them “you’d be beautiful if only….” are just trying to get them to fall into line.
But is all that going to be as powerful as the onslaught of messages they get from everywhere else?
Aug 252007
Thanks to ahunt for pointing me to Gangly Thoughts, and to a post about hitting that Certain Age where the invisible sign around one’s neck that reads ATTENTION ALL MEN: PLEASE COMMENT ON WHETHER YOU FIND ME FUCKABLE starts to get a little faded and weather-worn.
Part of me is really enjoying this slide into the invisibility of females over 35. Part of me is just pissed off. Look, I don’t need the hassle, but when even the lack of hassle pulls you into the swirl of the patriarchy and assigns you your rank therein, it’s annoying as hell.
It reminds me that back in the day, I used to explain to people that the difference between being a stripper and not is that people who want to stare at and harass strippers generally have to pay in advance for the privilege.
Aug 242007
I couldn’t bring myself to waste time reading through a “but if I shave my legs are you mean jealous ugly dykes going to take away my feminist membership card?” post, but Mighty Ponygirl has a stronger stomach than I do (and more patience).
Bluntly, if you’re wearing Raspberry Shimmer Lipgloss or putting on 5″ strappy heels, you’re not doing it because it’s “empowering”. You’re doing it because you’re conforming to cultural norms (which is much more comfortable than going against those norms), and because it gets you the approval of the opposite sex. And that’s okay. What’s not okay is pretending that playing your assigned role in the patriarchal script gives you any more power than the people who want to fuck you are willing to let you have.
If the world changed tomorrow so that leg-shaving were seen as disgusting, creepy and something only man-hating ugly dykes did, would women still find it empowering? You know the answer to that one.
Aug 182007
Dizzy writes an excellent post about dealing with “friends” (sadly, she left out the quotes) who think it’s their job to lecture us girls on how we shouldn’t be all angry and feminist-y, and how mean we are to men, and how if we were really, truly strong women we wouldn’t need all that strident feminist nonsense. tenacious snail follows up with her own thoughts. Both get comments in the idiotic-to-clueless range.
From my point of view, it’s really very simple: I’m not interested in “defending feminism,” soothing the hurt feelings of guys who are offended, deeply offended, that anyone would suggest they have male privilege, who confuse plain old traditionalist Cosmo Girl man-hating with feminism, or who want to dissect what “feminism” means and why it should really be “humanism”.
In other words, I’m a feminist. If you can’t deal with that, fuck off. Dying in the process is preferred, but optional.
I don’t mind if you hesitate to use the “f-word” for your own self. I don’t care if you like or dislike particular feminist organizations or writers; your opinions on NOW or Andrea Dworkin are not deal-breakers. But if you get pouty because It’s Not My Fault I Have A Penis; if you really believe women are pampered and spoiled and men always get the short end of the stick; if you think there is no such thing as male privilege; if you truly think that only weak women are victims of sexism, and then only at the hands of a tiny minority of men; if you think discussions of sexism are a personal insult to you…then I refer to, and incorporate by reference herein, the previous direction to fuck off.
Oh, and the above applies to women as well. If you preen at how much more special you are than all those silly girly-girls, if you are convinced that sexism is a myth invented by less-capable women because you’ve certainly never seen any of it, if you have ever used the phrase “vive le difference” in earnest, if you like the idea that your role in life is to have doors opened for you and your bills paid as your proper due for allowing someone to have sex with you…you, too, are offered VIP seating on a fast vessel that will take you back under your rock where you belong.
If you see yourself in the above, or if it merely hurts your little feelings, don’t bother commenting here. Don’t bother responding in real life, either. We’ll be much happier without each other.
Aug 132007
While the New York Times patiently (and probably futilely) points out that men’s and women’s reports of their number of sex partners doesn’t match, John Scalzi has a much more elegant explanation.
Less amusing is the possibility that women aren’t counting nonconsensual sexual encounters, and men are. But this probably isn’t skewing the numbers to the point that, as in the article, one survey finds men reporting twice as many sex partners as women.
Jul 152007
In response to Sanya’s post over at Eating Bees about the whole “lady gamer” thing, you’d expect the usual whiny “waaaa not all men are evil!!!!” it’s-all-about-me denial comments. Less common, but also expected, are the comments that pretend we live in a 1940s movie.
You know, the type of movie that people who declare “Vive le difference!” love to watch, where the battle of the sexes is conducted in witty repartee, and where a man who gets too far out of line earns himself a ringing, yet feminine, slap in the face, after which all caddery ceases.
How else to explain the mindset that if you point out a problem, you can’t possibly be doing anything at all about the problem, and the best response to sexist assholes in gaming is “STFU or GTFO”? That if enough women silently pick up their dice/character sheets/epic armor and go elsewhere, the fools will see the error of their ways?
I’m all for action as a result of, rather than a substitute for, a complaint, but I’m also rather cynical. Which means I’m also aware that people who bleat about “STFU or GTFO” really mean one thing: STFU. They don’t want to hear about it, they certainly don’t want to hear that they might be part of the problem, and they don’t want the ladies casting any aspersions on their beloved hobby, which is both a downer and might lead to armor models that actually cover female avatars’ entire bodies, if you can believe it.
As daskindt pointed out, some people get extremely petulant when it’s pointed out that their hobby is not as wonderful for everyone as it is for them. Especially if “making it better for others” means an ounce of consideration from their own sorry selves.
Jun 152007
(Trial is done for the moment and I’ve been home sick with Lung Horror, so you all finally get a new blog post.)
Minor back-and-forth in the feminist blogosphere at the moment about marriage and feminist responses thereto–from people getting shrieky at the revelation that some “traditions” are more than a little sexist, to Jill’s realization that maybe this marriage thing is not necessary nor inevitable, to Hugo’s musing on how marriage is an emotional raw deal for women.
That said, one thing in Amanda’s latest puzzles me, because it’s not really about marriage: Why shack up?
It’s not that I think “living in sin” is, well, sinful. Or necessarily wrong. But I’ve always seen it as a precursor to something more permanent; you’re setting up your household, you’re just not waiting for the blessing of the ceremony to start moving in the furniture. I don’t see it as a natural stage in the progression of a romantic relationship–we’ve been dating exclusively for [period of time] so now we’re living together. What’s the point? So that if you break up, you can add the fun of finding a new apartment and sorting through your DVDs to the other trauma? So that people will realize you’re really, truly a couple? Because it’s easier to avoid any potential sexual tension between roommates if you start off sleeping together?
This isn’t a criticism, just utter bafflement. Thoughts?
Best “how to draw comics” article. Ever.
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May 112007
I can’t really explain Your Cousin Vito’s how-do any better than telling you to go look.
Somebody needs to print this and staple it to Joe Quesada’s forehead.
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